Last week was SO last week

Last week was SO last week 4-26-10

26 April 2010 No Comment

A single week can be infinitely generous. The internet is a rare cultural farmland that needs no government subsidies. It is completely self-sufficient and always seems to grow a bountiful feast for us to harvest. And harvest we will.
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5. Arsch Bar, Bar Rectum

I run across a lot of really gross items online and I try my best to really keep from sharing the majority of them. This one rode the line and had to be shared. I mean, what would I feel comfortable drinking in this bar? Wouldn’t it be weird if it smelled pleasant in there? Next time you are in Austria to check out the world renowned and internationally respected Opera houses, make sure you stop by the BarRectum and order a Mudslide. I just love this world.

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4. Basement Strip Club, Detroit MI

Since were on the subject of dank, smelly, gross, cramped locations I give you Club Thunderbolt. When the going gets tough, the tough goes to Jays wood-panel lined basement. At least he doesn’t look creepy.

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3. South Park Jihad, Mohammad Bear Suit

South Park has been on for 14 years and this is the first Holy War that has been declared on Trey Parker and Matt Stone? How can that be? Well, either way it is pretty scary when you wrap your head around it. It seems like a joke until you read up on Theo van Gogh. In response to this audacious threat Comedy Central censored the episode. Don’t even let me get started on this shit. Makes me fucking crazy.

Check it out: read the Guardian article

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2. Beard Threat Chart, Trustworthiness Meter

I figured the last post may have made some of you feeling worried and nervous. FEAR NOT! I am supplying you with a handy-dandy Beard Trustworthiness Chart to help properly profile who to fear and who to fondle.

Check it out: i.imgur.com

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1. Dancing Mascot Injuries and Optimus Prime Balloon Animals, Hell yea!

Sometimes it is hard to decide when you have two wonderful choices. Well, here at Two Four Flinching you can have your cake (dancing mascots getting terribly injured while dancing) and you can eat it too (Large man creates impressive 7ft tall balloon animal sculpture transformers). Can I get you a spork?

First things first. What is worse than wearing a giant purple, pear-shaped, sweaty, stinky Grimace-looking costume and dancing around on a dugout like a total asshole? Well, wearing a sweaty, stinky wolf-headed costume and falling off the edge of the dugout while dancing around like an asshole.

This guy has been waiting his whole life for this moment. All the years spent as an outcast and a social oddity are now behind you kind sir. Bask in the warmth of your glory.